I loved seeing these kids! We need more of this!

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I woke up this morning to a video a friend posted on Facebook of our girls’ volleyball team returning home from winning the state championship yesterday.  I had watched the girls win yesterday afternoon on her live stream and got choked up then, and found myself even more emotional when M called me just after they won to tell me...but this video of the girls coming home, lead by a police escort, to a crowd of their family and friends...it did me in.  My little blonde ponytail of a girl was in that crowd, cheering for her friends, sharing that moment with them - a moment that few kids get to experience, but even more special this year.  See, THIS is what I want for her...these moments of celebration...these moments with her friends...these moments that when she looks back at her junior year she will know there were things so much more memorable than Covid and the election.  I want so badly for her to have normal high school moments that become cherished memories with these people she has grown up with, moments that shape and solidify friendships and show these kids that life is best lived in the moment and not behind a screen.

I’ve thought a lot lately about the time we have, and the people we spend it with.   One of my dearest friends text me the other day and said she feels like we are being robbed of time and I had to agree.  I feel stuck in many ways, like I’m in quicksand and don’t know how to move beyond this Groundhog Day of a moment.  No, I’m not depressed or anything, but I hate that we are missing out on so much right now...that most of this year feels sort of lost.  Maybe it’s the upcoming holidays making me feel even more nostalgic.  Maybe it’s the realization that M is getting closer and closer to being grown up and I feel like precious time is being stolen from us - yes, we have had extra time together, but we haven’t done many of the things we would have typically done this year and I can’t stand the fact that we aren’t even really able to plan anything for the future.  I see this virus all around us, impacting so many, pushing pause on so many aspects of life.  That’s why seeing our kids in that video hit me so hard...there was no pause button, they were living out loud and it felt so good to see them get to enjoy and celebrate and just be kids.  

I miss my people.  I miss happy hours and Sunday brunch.  I miss Saturday shenanigans and last minute plans that become the best memories.  I am guilty of living way too much of my life behind a screen this year and I’m certain it’s adding to my increasing anxiety.  Right now it’s easy to feel like there are so many uncertainties, so many things out of our control.  How do we focus on what we can control?  How do we find joy in the mundane we might feel stuck in?  How do we best use the 20% we have (the other 80% is the stuff we can’t do anything about)?  Honestly, I’m not entirely sure.  But, I’m gonna do all I can to try and LIVE more.  

I’m so thankful our kids are getting some incredible moments together.  That their lives have more to them than listening to us freak out about a virus and feel anxious about an election.  I’m so thankful they can celebrate and be kids and create memories that they do not realize will be something wonderful to look back on in time.  Here’s to more moments that become incredible memories...for all of us.