This life
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""We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect."
- Anais nin

​close to perfect.  sometimes messy.  almost always complicated.  blessed.  a little unfocused.  always searching.  constantly hoping.  mine.

9.25.16

9/25/2016

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The biggest complaint I have about my little house is the inability to see the sunset.  I can see a small glimpse of it, but never the whole thing in all its glory and I LOVE sunsets.  I always have.  I used to think it was sun rises I loved most, but no, it's sunsets.  The breathtaking beauty always stops me in my tracks, forcing me to pause and reflect, thinking through whatever thoughts I may be struggling with in that moment.  Often I find myself  a bit emotional as the sky brightens into shades beyond description before fading into a pale, shimmery glow just before the day gives way to night.  

Today was rainy and dreary...a nice, sleepy, quiet Sunday so when I looked outside and saw pinks and oranges on the horizon I found myself needing to see tonight's story unfold.  I threw on shoes and ran up the hill, trying to find the best vantage point.  I ended up standing next to M's school where I was able  to catch it at it's most radiant.  There is something about a sunset at the end of a rainy day.  I've always been amazed at how somehow it can literally rain all day and, yet, at the end of it all, there is a gentle reminder that no matter how stormy it may have been, there is something worth waiting for.  I guess maybe that's why I love sunsets so much.  I try really hard to keep things in perspective...to remember that no matter how bad things may seem, it can always be worse and that even at the end of a really awful day we get another shot tomorrow.  Sunsets are a visual version of that I suppose.  It's also like the ocean...something so much greater, so much larger, so much more than myself...something beautiful for the world to see...something that makes me feel small, insignificant, humble...and it reminds me to refocus for a bit.  

So, tonight as I stood there on top of the hill overlooking the middle school football field, I thought of where I am right now....a weekend well-spent...a shifting focus...a redirection...simple moments turned into new memories.  My eyes filled with tears and I didn't want to turn my gaze, but as all things do...the view quickly changed, diminished, faded...making way for whatever is to come next.  
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